12-17-2006, 02:40 PM
Quote:
Wael, marriage is a natural bond. In the same way as I can't divorce my mother or my father or my brother or my sister... I can't divorce my spouse either. When we enter into a covenantal marriage, we are not signing a 50-50 contract, we are vowing to give 100-100. It's an exchange of persons, not goods. We make a faithful & everlasting promise to ourself, our partner & to God.
The Church allows couples to separate under severe circumstance, but they must always have an intention to reconcile. In the eyes of God & the Church, you'll always be validly married to your spouse, therefore, starting another physical relationship with someone is considered adultery
Hi Faith,
As you say, our actions are inspired by our conscience. One size does not fit all. Is it reasonable then, to assume that every couple having marital difficulty will be able to reconcile and make ammends?
For example: I know of one situation where the husband was very abusive with the wife and children. There were endless advices and people trying to help the family, but the man would not change. In fact, the abuse just became worse and worse to the point that the lives of the wife and kids was in danger. Their last family vacation ended with the husband in jail for assult, the mother in the hospital, and the children staying with reletives until she had recovered well enough to come home.
I cant believe for one second that God will wish to punish this woman further by forcing her to stay married with this man, OR even if she did divorce to prevent her from marriage with a good man who will care for her and support her and her children. THAT is the real hardness of the heart.
God knows better than us the many circumstances that will arise in marriage, be they this extreme or soemthing else. Sometimes divorce is the only option. And brother Wael said, in Islam, it is the most hated of the permissible actions. Therefore, we should try to avoid it and save ourselves from it as much as possible. But sometimes we just cannot.