Dowry in islam

[khadeeja]

assalam wa alaikum,


i would like to find out what are all the acceptable dowries used in islam given to women.i am soon to be married and i am a bit lost concerning this because i know women should not over exaggerate what they for their dowry.Can someone fill me in on it so i can give the best answer. Jazakallah .


salaams,


Khadeeja.

[naseeha]

Lol...


Hmmm I cant wait to see where this tread goes LOL


Salaam All


and welcome back to the board khadeeja

[Dan]

Bismillah


As Salam alaikum


I have given $3,000 and $5,000 in dowry (US dollars). I have been told this is a lot so maybe less than that would be more on target. A woman can ask for anything for dowry.


I've heard of woman just asking for a nice qur'an.


For what that's worth...


As Salam alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatu

[Kal]

I'd ask for a car.


And I dont mean those 2nd hand ones..


EDIT: If my future-wife sees this post one day, then just for the record - i did not mean what i said in the above. I repeat, i was only joking.

[khadeeja]

salaam,


well thanks for your advice you guys, but i think i need more feedback.

[Dan]

Bismillah


As Salam alaikum


I think it is hard to really nail down an average bc it varies not just by country but ethnic, economic, and spiritual standing. It really might take asking sisters in your community who you feel are strong in their deen to get what I think you are asking for.


As Salam alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatu

[NaSra]

Asalamalaikum 2 all :D


Naseeha and Khadeeja :biggrinlove:


Khadeeja


Every culture is different dear sis. In my culture dowry is usually paid in Gold and Money. I have seen Sisters asking for all kinds of different dowries. :D


Some Sisters ask for Gold a whole set (like necklace, earings, rings, and bangles on each side of her wrists, and ofcourse the one on the foot lol. If your either of Pakistani or indian or somali origin u'll probably not know what I meant with the foot. It's like a thin gold bracelet that goes around the ankle. In my Culture if a woman is married and doesn't have that set of gold it's not considered nice. Sorry to keep going on and on about the Gold :ban: .


I got something in that nature for my dowry and some money. When my husband asked me what I wanted for dowry, I didn't know what I wanted, I just wanted him. When he asked me "What should I bring" I said "Bring yourself". He reminded me of the importance of having my dowry, then he chose something for me.


I've seen Sisters asking to be taken to Haj, and to be taught the Quraan (MashaAllah). :biggrinlove:


So Sis, is there something u love? Anything which has value, regardless of whether it be something material or something non-material, is acceptable as dowry. Do you like Jewellery? Do you Like Hadith books? "Do you like clothes"? "What about Decorations for ur new home"? "Is there a part of the world that you really want to see"? Like India? I always wanted to go there and see the Taj Mahal :biggrinlove: Just a few questions for u to consider sis..........


I will leave u with these Ayahs:


<b>Allah says in the Qur'an:</b>


<b>{Wa aatoo an-nisaa'a saduqaatihinna nihlatan...}</b>



{And give the women their dowries with a good heart...}


<i>An-Nisaa:</i>


<b>{...Fa ma istamta'tum bihi minhunn fa aatoohunna ujoorahunna fareedha...}</b>



{...So for that pleasure which you have enjoyed from them, give them their prescribed compensation..} An-Nisaa:24


This does not mean though that the woman is a product to be sold (like in some cultures they do); rather it is a symbol of honor and respect, and a sign that the husband is willing to shoulder his responsibilities and fulfill his duties. :biggrinlove:

[khadeeja]

assalam wa 'alaikum:


oh! jazakallah nasra, you know i think i did tell naseeha the same thing you told your husband! now, i have so many options i still don't know what to do.insha allah i would like to make hajj insha allah,i like clothing andi now started to read some islamic books........i hope insha allah that i make the right decision that will make both of us happy .thank you again nasra and Dan.


salaams

[Muslimah]

Bismillah


as salam alykom


Welcome back Khadija, Mash a Allah, it is nice to see you checking about your dowry. May Allah Bless whatever nice is going to give. :biggrinlove:

[naseeha]

Salaam all


Wow..


this is actually harder to think about than i thought.


Call me a sentimental fool.. but her dowry is her gift from me. I wanted it to be something that she can have for life. To remember me when I die (if i die before her). To me giving cash kinda defeats this.


I would much rather take any amount of cash as necessary and get her something meaningful.


whaddaya thnk?