08-04-2003, 05:22 PM
Sis. Muslimah, it is ok, for you to move it where ever, I'm not that good with computers.
The only reason why I feel this way is becuase, I've seen some friends from here and other countries suffer, in polygamy, I've seen a muslim brother with non-muslim wife marry a 2nd who was muslim, (It didn't last).
Allah (swt) dislikes divorce and we should avoid it by being careful, who we marry and for what.
It's embarrassing when I know my brother who I may hang out with, have his wife on foodstamps and monthly checks, he had a couple of extra dollars in his pockets go get another wife.
sometimes, I say things, but I've learned to just make duas, and I fight against myself also, never to mistreat any sister in that manner. I have a sister of my own, and I love my mom, and all the women in my family, (they are christians< but if they are hurt by their husbands, I'd speak up to their Husbands, just the same.>
I will also say that sisters should care enough about the other sister to at least see how is the first sister before marrying her husband. It's not good to be close to each other, but at least have her write a letter.
the Prophet (saaws) never forced his wives to be together , he (saaws) said be good to each other and behave, some got along and some didn't, but they all had their own homes, and never caused too many problems for each other.
there are other brothers who fear Allah enough to do each wife right and be fair. I have a friend that repays his wife for everyhting she spends of her foodstamps and money (so that's a different story), anything she spends he'll return to her in cash and I have to respect him for that. She is his only wife, but the fact that he'll take care of his duties like that, I admire him.
When a sister comes with nothing, the brother completes all his duties (maintaining for her), then want another wife without taking from the first, the first sister can't go against it at all. the brother should be respected. Or if the 1st wife can't have children, or don't like sexual relations, then the brother can get another. the cases are different.
I just believe that we should cherish the women, that's the way the Prophet (saaws) told us in his (saaws) farewell khutbar, he (saaws) mentioned it a couple of times.
As-salaamu alaikum wa rahmantu'llahi wa baraktu!