A man's fair opinion about polygyny

[Amatullah]

)وَإِنْ خِفْتُمْ أَلَّا تُقْسِطُوا فِي الْيَتَامَى فَانْكِحُوا مَا طَابَ لَكُمْ مِنَ النِّسَاءِ مَثْنَى وَثُلاثَ وَرُبَاعَ فَإِنْ خِفْتُمْ أَلَّا تَعْدِلُوا فَوَاحِدَةً أَوْ مَا مَلَكَتْ أَيْمَانُكُمْ ذَلِكَ أَدْنَى أَلَّا تَعُولُوا) (النساء:3) [/size:59c53ae4f6]

<span>[b:59c53ae4f6]And if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphan­girls, then marry (other) women of your choice, two or three, or four but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one or (the captives and the slaves) that your right hands possess. That is nearer to prevent you from doing injustice.[/b:59c53ae4f6][/color:59c53ae4f6]</span>

<span>Brother Al3a3</span>

<span>Where does it say that marrying one is better than polygyny ?</span>

<span>The Ayah says that one is better [b:59c53ae4f6]IF [/b:59c53ae4f6]the man can [b:59c53ae4f6]Not [/b:59c53ae4f6] be fair if he marries more than one, but it didn't say that marrying one is better in any case.</span>

<span>For Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala has made polygyny permissable for many reason, it is His wisdom, some of those reasons we know and some we don't.</span>

<span>----------------</span>

<span>I also wanted to talk about another issue related to polygany, we tend to a lot of times blame everything on the man when it is sometimes the woman's fault. Some men choose to marry a second wife because the first one [b:59c53ae4f6]neglects him [/b:59c53ae4f6] and [b:59c53ae4f6]doesn't do her duty[/b:59c53ae4f6]. If a woman is not going to do her duty towards her husband and is going to neglect him then she should not complain if he decides to marry another one.</span>

<span>Also, problems from polygany are not only brought by men because of being unfair, I read stories where the wives themselves because of exaggerated jeolusy (which is bad) caused problems for each other and made the mans life kind of misreable. Sometimes it is the first wife who is bad and causes problems to the 2nd wife, and sometimes it is the 2nd wife who causes problems for the first wife. It is very sad.</span>

<span>That is why the man should pick a good Musleemah for a wife.</span>

<span>If every Muslim followed the rules of Allah and the sunnah of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم then there wouldn't be any problems.</span>

<span>Allah almusta'an.</span>

<span>May Allah guide us and all Muslims to the straight path. </span>