04-14-2006, 02:19 PM
Bismillah
salam Mahasvapna
Sorry for coming here again, but i thought this reply would be more relevant here.
After reading your response on the Gay Muslim thread, and making the connection with what u posted here about yourself. Never did u consider that such an inclination which actually opened up in you conincided with the rebel phase specially against the departure of your father, the objection to having a family of your own with your own naturally born chidlren lest you do the same to them. As u said, at the end of your stay with your father u were able to mend your wounds but not fully.
Havent u examined the possibility that it also conincided with the rebel phase towards the fear of God and that christianity teaches that this man is sitting there waiting for you to sin?
Well I can see a clear connection with all of that.
Again I will just stop here since i know how sensitive this matter is, I d never have discussed it in public unless u were open about it.
But I will give u another idea, do try and ask Allah's Guidnace on this, but when u do as I suggested before use those supplications i posted, also when u do, make sure that deep inside your heart u r only talking about the One Creator Who Created all without any contemplations on the other dieties or how can they achieve their specialities.
Just a thought.