08-13-2003, 12:08 PM
I too pray that I state what is right, insha'llah
For the most part, good practising brothers are very good to their wives. According to their means, they provide shelter, food, clothing, and when abled a gift or two, (not a gift for the house, Brothers, but for them personally, ha!ha!ha!)
some of us have a good sense of humor, some romantic, and some very serious, but women mainly need an ear to listen, a husband to comfort them alot (for us we, are different being, men), and for us to be a little softer than we can be, sometimes if difficult, for the world we need to be firm, and unwind when we get home.
YES, compassion is a big part of islam and we should show it at all times, but when we are stressed, and need time to think and be alone, the wives shouldn't take it as if we don't love them.
***I don't know the hadith by memory, but it goes like: (when a wife is angry with her husband she forgets the good that he has done. *** Ha!Ha!Ha!
If you are married you'll know what I'm talking about, we can just be tired, and she wants to play or talk, then all of a sudden, she feels you're not interested, or if she wants something and you can't get it at that time, she feels you don't want to make her happy.
An older brother , I think he was from Sudan told me "women are like babies" and I see that is true or at least they are soft and sensitive like babies, we brother can be a bit tiring too.
But brother it is not right for her to say no, for love-relations, or disobey us, because she's upset, when we have not even wronged her at all.
TRUE WE MUST BE PATIENT, AND UNDERSTANDING WITH OUR SENSITIVE WOMEN, THIS IS SOMETING WE MUST WORK ON, TO GROW INTO GOOD MUSLIM MEN.
I wasn't talking of how we deserve to be obeyed as an oppression to the women. I just wanted to keep it short, when I first made thoe statements, but I see i had to further explain myself.
Al-hamdu'llah, Bro. Todd, I'm coool with what you've said and totally agree. Life is not worth much without our muslim women. (with all respect) Never placing parteners besides Allah, of course!
I pray I didn't offend anyone, I know both men and women can be ungrateful at times and also loved very much, but we must be good to be blessed like that.
As-salaamu alaikum wa rahmantu'llah