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A Sister In Need...
#1

As salamu aleykum wr wb


Peace and blessing of Allah swt be upon you all Muslims.


I have come online to ask a question. My dear sister is in need. She feels like the shame of her family concerning the sins she had done which she is so ashamed to speak about. She hasnt revealed it to anybody except me and does not want anybody to know about it. I try to confort her saying that Allah swt is ever Forgiving but even though she is well aware, she cannot make herself believe that. I understand why she is ashamed but this hatreat for herself has, sometimes, put a barrier between her and Allah swt. I can see that she feels sometimes that she is one of those who are destined for Hell-Fire. I don't know what to say to her anymore. At times, when she is okay and follows Islam normaly, she gets these flashbacks and suddenly falls into hatreat and regret. She keeps praying that her sins will not be revealed. I don't know how to make her believe that she too can be forgiven as long as she hasnt done any shirk (which she hasn't). Please give me some advice to tell her before she loses hope for good and leaves Islam thinking that she isn't deserving of the truth and then commits suicide.


I urge you, plz give me advise.


As salamu aleykum wr wb

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#2

Asalamalaykum


No matter how great the sin, the door of repentance is always open. Allah loves to forgive. The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) told us in a famous hadith that if we did not sin, Allah would create other people who would sin so that He could forgive them. He also told us that the one who repents from a sin is like the one who has no sin.


Allah says in the Qur’an:


<b>“Say, ‘O my servants who have wronged themselves: despair not of Allah’s mercy; surely Allah forgives all sins; surely, He is Most Merciful and Compassionate.’” (39:53)</b>



Allah says in the Qur'an:


<b>"Except those who repent, have faith and good deeds, those Allah will charge their sins for good deeds. Certainly Allah is most forgiving and merciful." (Qur'an 25:70)</b>



This is a greatest glad tiding for those who repent and combine their repentance with deep faith and good deeds.


<b>Abu Bakr Al siddiq (May Allah be pleased with him), narrated:</b>





<b>"I heard Prophet Mohammad (PBUH) saying: ‘There isn’t a man who, when he commits a sin, rises, makes ablution, and offers two rak'as of prayers, but Allah forgives his sins.’</b>


<b>Allah says in the Qur'an:</b>



<b>"Those (are the true believers) who, when they commit an evil deed, or wrong their souls, remember Allah, and seek forgiveness for their sins - and who but Allah forgives sins? They do not insist upon the sins they have committed, and they know (that Allah is forgiving)." (Qur'an 3:135)</b>

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#3

As salamu aleykum wr wb


Jazakallah khair intuition. InshAllah I will relate this to her. Just hope that she will realize how forgiving Allah swt is. [Image: smile.gif] thnx


As salamu aleykum wr wb

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#4



Quote: As salamu aleykum wr wb
Peace and blessing of Allah swt be upon you all Muslims.


I have come online to ask a question. My dear sister is in need. She feels like the shame of her family concerning the sins she had done which she is so ashamed to speak about. She hasnt revealed it to anybody except me and does not want anybody to know about it. I try to confort her saying that Allah swt is ever Forgiving but even though she is well aware, she cannot make herself believe that. I understand why she is ashamed but this hatreat for herself has, sometimes, put a barrier between her and Allah swt. I can see that she feels sometimes that she is one of those who are destined for Hell-Fire. I don't know what to say to her anymore.  At times, when she is okay and follows Islam normaly, she gets these flashbacks and suddenly falls into hatreat and regret. She keeps praying that her sins will not be revealed. I don't know how to make her believe that she too can be forgiven as long as she hasnt done any shirk (which she hasn't). Please give me some advice to tell her before she loses hope for good and leaves Islam thinking that she isn't deserving of the truth and then commits suicide.


I urge you, plz give me advise.


As salamu aleykum wr wb

Wassalam. I feel sorry for her... Its is not easy for her... It will take yaers untils she is ok..My Allah swt heal her soul...amin .Some islamic books helps sometimes.


beg to Allah swt always, to help her. There is somethink in such so situation what advice giver not know and will never know until they dont taste same feelings.


Allah swt, help his/her, because Allah swt know everythink about the person. The People know only what is said and doing, but not the thoughts. Wassalam

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#5

As salaam alaikum warahmatullah


Ask her to ask forgiveness from Allah (swt) for the sin she has commited and to try hard not to repeat that sin again, by praying two rakat salah taubah.


salam.

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#6

Salam Aleykom,


May I recommend that you might want to approach her as a "child". From past experiences I found that sometimes people tend to retreat into thinking that some of the damage or hurt they caused someone or even themselves is unrepairable. Using simple examples such as a mother forgiving her child of any wrong oing may slowly lead her into believing that forgiveness is guaranteed by Allah (swt) is repentance is sencere! And to Allah is the most exalted example, but usually we tend to feel ashamed of what we do and believe that is can never be mended, but remind her that is why Allah has given the blessing of forgiveness, because even is we repeatedly commit sins Allah will repeatedly forgive is the repentance is sincere every time.


Also a reminder that it is shaitan that wispers to your friend that itis impossible to be forgiven. And you may also recite the Hadith Qudsi where Allah (swt) explains how even if is most disobedient servant approaches him with a mountian of sins, and wants Allah to forgive him/her Allah (swt) will return an equivilant amount of forgiveness in return. (Paraphrasing)


And alwaysa good reminder that Allah (swt) has created us with an ability to sin so he can forgive us. May Allah grant us his mercy and forgiveness on the Day of reckoning Ameen.

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#7

as salam alykom


first I would like to welcome our brother Alfarouk to the boards, Mash a Allah u made an important point that I d like to elaborate on. Yusrah, first I pray to Allah you r fine, we havent seen u on for sometime. One of Allah's Names is Attawab (One Who grants repentance). If we dont sin this attribute will not function, Allah's Names and Attributes must function eternally. Allah Even Loves one who sins and repents, if we dont sin and repent, Allah Shall replace us with those who sin and repent.

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#8

Quote: Jazakallah khair intuition. InshAllah I will relate this to her. Just hope that she will realize how forgiving Allah swt is. [Image: smile.gif] thnx

Wayaki Yusrah


MashaAllah everyone is giving such nice advice, but I'm just going to pitch in and add some more thoughts. I think its really important that just as much as we fear Allah we should also always keep in our minds and hearts that Allah is the most and oft-forgiving, and the most mercyful.


If you sincerly repent and believe strongly that Allah is Big enough that he can forgive you, he'll InshaAlllah, ( Allah knows best) but I'm not sure if Allah will forgive anyone who does not believe in Allah's mercy and forgiveness.


Allah is Qafoorul Raheem wa shadiidul Iqaab. [Image: smile.gif]


InshaAllah yusrah keep reminding your sister of how Allah forgives if we believe in his forgiveness.


also relate this important message to your sister its what I run with to people who tell me that Allah will not forgive them:


<b>"God has said, `O son of Adam, so long as you call upon Me and ask of Me, I shall forgive you for what you have done, and I shall not mind. O son of Adam, were your sins to reach the clouds of the sky and were you then to ask forgiveness of Me, I would forgive you. O son of Adam, were you to come to Me with sins nearly as great as the earth and were you then to face Me, ascribing no partner to Me, I would bring you forgiveness nearly as great as it [i.e. the earth]'". </b>



May Allah increase your sisters imaan.


ta ta

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#9

Quote:
Allah is Qafoorul Raheem wa shadiidul Iqaab. [Image: smile.gif]



Mash a Allah sister Mash a Allah I fully agree with this true Allah Does not forgive those who are desparate of His forgiveness.


Just a slight correction, because when it comes to His Names I like to make sure they are correct


Ghafurn Raheem


He Is Oft forgiving and Most Compassionate.


[Image: smile.gif]

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#10

asalamalaikum


I appreciate the correction Muslimah, thanks a lot [Image: biggrin.gif]

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