Very Important....Urgent

[littleangel]

Why do the man have the right to marry 4 women, while the woman marry one?

I wish to have a satisfying answer...

May Allah Bless You.

[AbuNoran]

Think about this for now:

If a woman were to marry 4 men and have children from each one, how would you know which child belongs to which father. Unless each man can wait his turn after 9 month. Just kidding.

The woman can marry all she want, but not more than one at the same time.

Usually the rate of death among men is higher than women, for wars, sickness, work related accidents, etc., so there are more women alive than men, and in order to keep those women from commiting adultry, ALLAH (SWT) permitted that the man can marry 4 women, but only if he will be just with all of them.

Being unjust with one of them is a very bad sin for a man to commit against that wife of the 4.

Insha ALLAH I will respond in details later, but just think about that for now and give your insights on that.

I hope I don't step on any of the women's nerves when talking about this subject. Lets wait and see

[Ali]

Assalaamoalaikum

These links can be helpful.

http://www.islamsms.com/bb/viewtopic.php?t=677

http://www.islamsms.com/bb/viewtopic.php?t=678

-- Ali

[Muslimah]

AS Salam Alykom

No AbuNoran you are not going to step on our neves on the contrary we need more discussion on this topic. It is certainly part of Shari` Allah and in all cases we must accept it. But goooo ahead talk about it.

I am in a hurry now littleangle, I am a female and may be can add something in here. But later INsh a Allah

[Muslimah]

As Salam Alykom Littleangle

Well first off welcome to the forum. The articles mentioned by brother Ali Mash a Allah are very perceptive. However, we may simply add something. It is that we are so used to questioning Allah's rules and laws being unkown and All Patient. Whereas, if for any reason we visit a doctor and he tells us take this medicine every 6 hours, this 3 times a day. We never question him why not the opposite. We are sure the doctor knows what he is doing. So how about the Creator All Wise Who Created us including this doctor whom we obey. Did I make sense?????

[SisterJennifer]

You are making perfect sense sister Muslimah.

Sometimes I think women in America become accustomed to competing with the men on any and all terms. I wonder if since the 'women's liberation' movement we actually took it a bit too far. I wonder sometimes we try to place ourselves above the men. I think this is true in some cases.

Some of us see men as being too sex obsessed, and it irritates us. When we hear someone talking about letting the men have multiple wives, for some, their blood will boil.

But do westren women contribute in to the corruption of the male brain? Maybe so. Have we become so accostumed to competition that we draw no boundries? Do we as a whole throw all caution to the wind, forsaking common descency, modesty, and self respect in an attempt to be noticed by the men?

Summer is officially here in Wisconson, and my God, every year the fashion for women becomes more and more ridiculous. Women are to be seen everywhere in tiny little skin tight tops, tiny little shorts and skirts that are so revealing. I cannot even shop for my 11 year old daughter in the girls department. There is nothing descent to choose from. Now I hear the teenagers are partaking in a nude summer camp. Where does it end?

And what effect do you logically expect this to have on the men? How about the young boys growing up in this society?

Is the problem [i:78d6badf5c]really[/i:78d6badf5c] with the men, or is it with the women?

Allah is wiser than us, who are we to question His wisdom?

OK, maybe this is a bit of a rant, but I think we need to seriously examine our roles and responsibilities as women and improve ourselves before we start pointing our fingers at the men all the time.

[Ali]

Assalaamoalaikum

I was reading a book, and in that book was a quote.

Katie Rophie wrote an article for Esquire in which she discussed this paradox

"Seen from outside, my life is the model of modern female independance...... But sometimes seems like my independance is in part an elabarotly constructed facade that hides [b:c0f21c1961]a more traditional feminine desire to be protected and provided for[/b:c0f21c1961]" [/quote:c0f21c1961]Who could understand women better than Allah who created women?

That's why islam tells women their role in the society.

Well having said that I myself didn't see many men in Pakistan who had more than one wife, and it is considered kind of a taboo (which it shouldn't be), but as I came here I came to know that there is a growing number of Muslim women (reverts, non reverts) who want to get married to religious men, and would be happily the second wife. Recently in one chat room I came across a lady who said that her husband apostated, and now she lives with her children alone (somewhere in austrailia and is a revert), when I asked her if she would be willing to be a second, or third wife, she said yes.

And in reality what if one of our sister gets widowed in a young age, would you marry her to a brother who can take care of her, or force her to live her life being alone.

I encourage good muslim brothers, who can afford another wife, to get married. There are a lot of sisters who are in financial need, and want moral and family support.

I am sorry my grammer is inexorable, but I would think that you get the gist?

<blockquote data-ipsquote="" class="ipsQuote" data-ipsquote-contentapp="forums" data-ipsquote-contenttype="forums" data-ipsquote-contentid="328" data-ipsquote-contentclass="forums_Topic"><div>Women are to be seen everywhere in tiny little skin tight tops, tiny little shorts and skirts that are so revealing. I cannot even shop for my 11 year old daughter in the girls department. There is nothing descent to choose from. Now I hear the teenagers are partaking in a nude summer camp. Where does it end? [/quote:c0f21c1961]

I am distraught myself, Its not easy for me to instill islamic teachings into my sibling's understanding. I was raised in a place, where we did not have all these ways of going astray. The biggest threat to us was TV, but these days there are so many ways for the youth to go astray. Its really hard to de-brainwash my siblings, after they come home from 6 hours in school (American brainwashing system).

-- Ali

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