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Men disobeying there wifes......
#1

Salaam,


I am new to this, and i am glad i found it as this site had answered alot questions for me, my biggest fear apart from being prepared for death, is marriage (is that wrong?)


In this message board we have spoken about women disobeying men, but what about men disobeying women? one of the main reasons to why i am scared to get involved/married is because of the stories i hear about men treating there other halfs really bad.


is there n e thing that a woman can do if her husband disobeys her?


Thank you


salaam

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#2


I cant recall if its a hadith but something was said to this effect: "That the best Gift to a man in this life is a Pious wife IE: a lady with Taqwa "


my 2 cents :and for women yall get us men, hell on earth , heaven later. Jjk shawty.


am married 8 months , Up n Downs, end of it my wife is my comfort n peace.

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#3

Quote: is there n e thing that a woman can do if her husband disobeys her?


Thank you


salaam

Im not married but , i know that there r 2 things which men want , food and *** , so if either one is stopped then i think the man would start obeying

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#4

Quote:Im not married but , i know that there r 2 things which men want , food and *** , so if either one is stopped then i think the man would start obeying

Hmm Look at little sheikh Suhail Speaking.....


If Kal's signature got edited for ur concern of "sexual inuendo"....and that u can say stuff like that is truly ridiculous....


Sorry to burst ur little bubble...oh oh...


<b>Shorty</b>


If you marry the right man InshaAllah u won't have to worry about a man mistreating you ukthi.


Men have rights over women and visa versa. You shouldn't obey anybody in what displeases Allah, and a man who mistreats his wife falls under the category of displeasing Allah.


Sister don't be scared InshaAllah, just be very careful who you marry. There are alot wonderful men who really know how to treat a woman.


I got my first inspiration from my father and how he treated my mother. Like a Queeen!! Growing around my parents, made me stand a high standard when it comes to men. I have always stayed away from men who wanted to "marry me" and happened to have a very backward thinking. No matter how good looking they were Alhamduliah. The ones who believe that a woman shouldnt be seen or heard.


Also watch out for control freaks and extremists. Women are very intuitive they usually know when somehting doesnt feel right. So listen to your instincts. My last advice for you would be, remember we all teach people how to treat us. InshaAllah you'll be a good wife one day who looks after her hubby and be a source of joy and peace in his life. We Muslim women should treat our husbands like Princes InshaAllah (I know some men make it hard for a woman).I also believe that a bad marriage isnt worth keeping if one feels miserable in it.


Peace n Love

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#5

Quote:Hmm Look at little sheikh Suhail Speaking.....

Im not a Sheikh yet but ill let u know when i become one........




Quote:Sorry to burst ur little bubble...oh oh...

Im not the one livng inside a bubble , thinking that the whole world is a conspiracy against the muslims

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#6

Bismillah


as salam alykom shorty


I see that your question is still not really answered, I will Insh aAllah try to answer it as brief as possible.


First, duty of obedience is imposed on women to men not vice versa.


However, a man should share with is wife issues and discusses matters after which he takes her advice and opinion as the Messenger salla Allah a`lyhee wa sallam did in many occaisons the closest to my mind now is when he consulted Umm Salama while trying to perform Umra and the Mushrekeen refused to let the Muslims in and requested they come back next year. The Muslims refused to shave and slaughter their animals signaling the release of their Ehram. They insisted to get into Mecca. The Messenger salla Allah a`lyhee wa sallam didnt know what to do. He consulted Umm Salama who adviced him to get out slaughter his animal and shave and they will follow. Which he did and it worked.


In case a man develops a wrong attitude such as filrting, or other Haram acts (drinking..ect), the woman may:


1. Talk to him in the name of Allah, most important thing, is that when she is doing this to do it in order to satisfy Allah not her Nafs. She does not have to give up, she has to expect an aggressive reaction since most of the people dont like to be reminded of their faults.


2. She has to make much dua for him.


3. She may seek the help of a close family members (male)- who is respected to both of them -to talk to him and remind him of Allah.


4. She may also seek the help of an Imam of the masjed.


5. In case the situation persists and she cannt put up with it, she may ask for divorce and the judge shall grant it to her immediately for harm.


And Allah Knows best.

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#7

Salaam,


Thank you to those of who did answer my question, Your answer was very helpful, thank you. I know i should be more optimistic, about marriage, but i am seriously not looking forward to it, i think its because of alll the stories i hear about todays relationships, the beating, abusing, cheating, flirting. etc etc.


Yeah its true , out parents have the perfect relationship. If i was ever to get married id lke to marry someone who is exactly like my dad.


Im sorry to be a pain, but does n e one know the rules of adopting in islam, as this has been an interest to me since ive been young. I would like to have my own too.


Thank you


allah hafiz

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#8

Bismillah


as salam alaykom shorty,


U havent been a pain or anything, what is this board for then? we are all here to help one another learn more and get closer to Allah. Better understand our religion.


Shorty, marriage is a blessing from Allah, it is the sunnah of Rasullah, we should not develop concerns. If we do, for example we will not do anything. We can also be concerned not to make it during exams, thus we dont study, or fail in work, then we dont apply for the job...etc.


shorty, any relation ship is subject to failure or success. If u marry in the name of Allah, try as much as possible to observe Allah's limits as a wife, Allah Shall Grant u success.


As for adoption:


http://islamsms.com/bb/index.php?showtopic=3670


read this thread, Nasra made the same question before.

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