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Anger Managment 2
#1

Short Temper 2


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Following the guidance of the Prophet (SAW) with regard to anger.


He is our example, and his attitude towards anger is clearly demonstrated in many ahaadeeth, of which one of the most famous was reported by Anas (RA), who said: "I was walking with the Messenger of Allah (SAW), and he was wearing a Najraani cloak with a stiff collar. He was accosted by a Bedouin who pulled his cloak roughly. I looked at the Prophet's (SAW) neck and saw the marks left by the collar. The Bedouin said: 'O Muhammad, give me some of the wealth of Allah that you have!' The Prophet (SAW) turned to him and smiled, and ordered that he should be given something." (Reported by al-Bazzaar. Ibn Hajar said that its isnaad is hasan).


Another way in which we may follow the example of the Prophet (SAW) is by making our anger for the sake of Allah (SWT), when the limits set by Allah (SWT) are violated. This is the worthy kind of anger.


The Prophet (SAW) became angry when he was told about the imaam who was putting people off praying because his recitation was too long. He became angry when he saw a curtain decorated with pictures of animate creatures in 'Aisha's (RA) house. He became angry when Usamah (RA) spoke to him about the Makhzoomi woman who was guilty of theft, and said to him, "Are you interceding concerning one of the punishments prescribed by Allah?" He became angry when he was asked questions he disliked. His anger was only for the sake of Allah (SWT).


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Knowing that suppressing anger is one of the signs of taqwa (piety).


Allah (SWT) has praised certain people in His Book, and the Prophet (SAW) highly commended them. There have been prepared for them Gardens as wide as the heavens and the earth. One of their characteristics is that they


"... spend (in Allah's Cause - deeds of charity, alms, etc.) in prosperity and in adversity, who repress anger, and who pardon men; verily, Allah loves Al-Muhsinun (the good-doers)." (Al-Imran 3:134)


These are the people whose good qualities Allaah has mentioned, people whom others admire and want to catch up with. Another of their characteristics is that


"...when they are angry, they forgive." (Ash-Shura 42:37)


<b>Paying attention when one is reminded. </b>


Anger is something natural, with regard to which people differ. It may be very hard for a person not to get angry, but a sincere person, if he becomes angry and is reminded about Allah (SWT), will remember Him and will stay within the limits that He has prescribed. Some examples of this follow.


Ibn 'Abbaas (RA) reported that a man asked permission to see 'Umar (RA), and permission was given. The man said, "O son of al-Khattaab, by Allah, you are not giving us much, and you are not ruling us fairly!" 'Umar (RA) became so angry that he was about to hit the man, but al-Hirr ibn Qays (who was among the people sitting with 'Umar) said, "O Ameer al-Mu'mineen, Allah said to His Prophet (SAW):


'Show forgiveness, enjoin what is good, and turn away from the foolish (i.e., don't punish them).' (Al-A'raf 7:199),


and this man is one of the foolish." By Allah, 'Umar (RA) did not take the matter any further when this was recited to him. He adhered to the words of Allah (SWT) (Reported by al-Bukhaari, al-Fath, 8/304).


This is how the Muslim should be, not like the evil hypocrite who, when he got angry and was told about the hadeeth of the Prophet (SAW), and was advised by one of the Companions of the Prophet (SAW) to seek refuge with Allaah from the Shaytaan, said, "Do you think there is something wrong with me? Do you think I am crazy? Go away!" (Reported by al-Bukhaari, al-Fath, 1/465).


We seek refuge with Allah (SWT) from failure. Ameen!


<b>Knowing the bad effects of anger. </b>


The bad effects of anger are many, harming both the self and others. A person may swear and utter obscenities, and may hit others, lashing out with no control. It may even lead to killing. The following story contains a lesson.


'Alqamah ibn Waa'il reported that his father (may Allah be pleased with him) told him: "I was sitting with the Messenger of Allah (SAW) when a man came along, leading another by a twisted rope. He said, 'O Messenger of Allah, this man killed my brother.' The Messenger of Allah (SAW) asked, 'Did you kill him?' He said, 'Yes, I killed him.' He asked, 'How did you kill him?' He said, 'He and I were hitting trees to make the leaves fall (so we could use them for animal fodder). He swore at me, so I got angry and hit him on the side of the head with an axe, and I killed him.'..." (Reported by Muslim in al-Saheeh, 1307).


Even if anger does not go as far as this, there may still be broken bones and injuries. If the person with whom a man is angry runs away, he may turn his anger upon himself, tearing his clothes, slapping his cheeks, falling unconscious, or breaking dishes and furniture.


One of the worst things that result from anger and cause social ills and family breakdown is talaq (divorce). Ask many of those who have divorced their wives how and when it happened, and they will tell you, "It was in a moment of anger."


Lives are shattered and children are lost as a result. Feelings of regret and failure haunt people's minds, and life becomes bitter - all because of anger. If only they had remembered Allah (SWT) and come back to their senses, restrained their anger and sought refuge with Allah (SWT) from the Shaitan, what happened would not have happened. Going against shari'ah only ever results in loss.


The physical harm that results from anger is very serious, as the doctors describe, such as thrombosis, high blood pressure, fatal heart attacks, diabetes, etc.


<b>We ask Allah (SWT) for good health. Ameen! </b>


The angry person should think about himself at the time of anger.


If the angry person could see himself in the mirror at the time of anger, he would despise himself and how he looks when his color changes, he shakes uncontrollably, his face reddens, the veins of his neck stand out and he behaves like a crazy person. He would be put off by his own appearance, but it is well known that the ugliness that exists inside a person is even worse than any that may appear on the outside. How happy the Shaitan must be when someone is in this state!


We seek refuge with Allah (SWT) from the Shaitan and from failure. Ameen!


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Du'aa'.


This is the believer's constant weapon. He asks his Lord to rid him of evils, problems and bad characteristics, and he seeks refuge with Allah (SWT) from falling into the pit of kufr and wrongdoing caused by anger, because one of the three qualities which will save a person from Hellfire is being just and fair both at times of contentment and at times of anger. (Saheeh al-Jaami', 3039). One of the du'aa's of the Prophet (SAW) was:


"Allaahumma bi 'ilmika'l-ghaybi wa qudratika 'ala'l-khalqi aheeni ma 'alimta'l-hayaata khayran li, wa tawaffani idha 'alimta'l-wafaata khayran li. Allaahumma wa as'aluka khashyataka fi'l-ghaybi wa'l-shahaadah, wa as'aluka kalimat al-ikhlaasi fi'l-ridaa wa'l-ghadab, wa as'aluka'l-qasda fi'l-faqri wa'l-ghinaa, wa as'aluka na'eeman la yanfad, wa qurrata 'aynin la tanqati', wa as'aluka'l-ridaa bi'l-qadaa', wa as'aluka bard al-'aysh ba'd al-mawt, wa as'aluka ladhdhat al-nadhr ila wajhika wa'l-shawqa ilaa liqaa'ik, fi ghayri darraa' mudirrah wa laa fitnati mudillah. Allaahumma zayyinnaa bi zeenati'l-eemaan wa'j'alnaa hudaatan muhtadeen"


(O Allah, by Your knowledge of the Unseen and Your power over all creation, keep me alive so long as You know life is good for me, and bring about my death when you know death is good for me. O Allah, I ask You to make me fear You in secret and in the open, I ask You to make me speak sincerely at times of contentment and at times of anger, I ask You to make me be moderate in poverty and in wealth, I ask You for a blessing that does not end, contentment that never ceases, and for acceptance of Your decree.


I ask You for a good life after death, and I ask You for the joy of looking upon Your face and the longing to meet You, with no harmful adversity or misleading trial (fitnah). O Allah, adorn us with the beauty of faith, guide us and let us be a means of guidance for others)." (Reported by al-Nisaa'i in al-Sunan, 3/55; and by al-Haakim. Saheeh al-Jaami', 1301).

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