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remedies foranger - jameela - 07-22-2006
Remedies for Anger
Sheikh Nâyif al-Hamad, presiding judge at the Rimâh District Courthouse
Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: “Allah did not send down any ailment sending sent down with it its cure.” [sahîh al-Bukhârî (5354)]
There are many remedies for the affliction of anger. We will be discussing but a few of them.
1. Seeking Refuge with Allah from Satan
Allah says: “And if (at any time) an incitement to discord is made to thee by Satan, seek refuge in Allah. He is the One Who hears and knows all things.” [sûrah Fussilat: 36]
Sulayman b. Sard relates that two mean were arguing in the presence of the Prophet (peace be upon him) until one of them became livid in the face and the veins in his neck stood out. The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “I know some words that if he were to say them, his anger would leave him. If he would say: ‘I seek refuge with Allah from Satan’ then he would calm down.” [sahîh al-Bukhârî (3108)]
Ibn al-Qayyim observes: “Anger sets itself upon the mind like a wolf sets itself upon a sheep. Satan attacks the mind more than anything else at times of anger and lust.”
2. Changing One’s Circumstances
When a person is angry, a change in circumstances can help him to get a grip on himself. It may be enough for him just to sit down.
Abû Dharr al-Ghifârî relates that the prophet (peace be upon him) said: “If one of you happens to be standing when he becomes angry, then he should take a seat. If this helps his anger to subside, then good and well. Otherwise, he should go and lie down.” [sunan Abî Dâwûd (4782) and Sahîh Ibn Hibbân (5688)]
3. Avoiding Arguments and Keeping Silent
Sheikh `Abd al-Rahmân al-Si`dî said: “It is good to keep in mind that when other people abuse you – especially when it is just verbal abuse – they are only harming themselves by it. They do not cause you any harm unless you give them your time and attention. When you do so, you are harmed by their abusing you just as much as they harm themselves by doings so. If you pay them no heed, they can cause you not injury.” It is just like an Arabian poet of old once said:
The fool addresses me with every ugliness
Yet I hate to answer his ire
He grows in foolery, and I in graciousness
Just like incense is wakened by fire.
Ibn `Abbâs relates that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “Teach the people and give them glad tidings. Do not make things difficult. And if you get angry, remain silent.” [Musnad Ahmad (3/249) Musnad al-Tayâlisî (2608) and al-Adab al-Mufrad (245)]
Ibn Rajab observes that silence: “is a powerful remedy against anger. This is because an angry person says things in his rage that he greatly regrets later on when his anger subsides. Some of the insults and statement made in anger can have harmful consequences. If the person keeps silent, he avoids all of that harm.”
4. Performing Wudû’
`Atiyyah al-Sa`dî relates that Allah’s Messenger (peace be upon him) said: “Anger is from Satan, and Satan was created from fire. Only water will extinguish fire, so if one of you gets angry, he should perform wudû’.” [Musnad Ahmad (4/226) and Sunan Abî Dâwûd (4784)]
Abû Sa`îd al-Khudrî relates that the prophet (peace be upon him) said: “Anger is a burning ember in the heart of a son of Adam. Do you not see the red glow of his eyes and the swelling of the veins in his neck? Therefore, whoever senses something of this coming on should go and perform wudû’.” [Musnad Ahmad (3/61), Sunan al-Tirmidhî (2191) and Mustadrak al-Hâkim (4/551). Al-Tirmidhî declares it to be a good and authentic hadîth]
5. Invoking the Remembrance of Allah
Allah says: “Those who believe and find their hearts’ contentment in the remembrance of Allah – Only through the remembrance of Allah can the heart find peace. ” [sûrah al-Ra`d: 28]
A person whose heart is content and in a state of balance because of Allah’s remembrance is as far from anger as a human heart can be.
Allah says: “And remember Allah if you forget.” [sûrah al-Kahf: 24]
`Ikrimah said about this verse: “To forget, here, means: to get angry.” [Tafsîr al-Tabarî (15/226)]
6. Considering the Consequences of One’s Anger
A person who gets angry all the time injures his health because of it. A bad tempered person is more prone to diabetes, hypertension, and numerous other stress related illnesses.
When a person is angry, he is prone to say and do things that he will regret later on when his anger subsides. Because of this , `Alî b. Abî Tâlib said: “The pleasure of giving pardon is followed by a praiseworthy outcome. The pleasure or taking revenge is followed by the bitterness of regret.”
Ibn Rajab writes: “Anger is a distemper of the blood of a person on account either fearing some wrong or out of a desire for revenge against some wrong that was done to him. It provokes many evil acts, like murder, assault, and other forms of oppression and transgression against people. Likewise, it provokes sinful speech, like slander and defamation. Sometimes a person can be brought to an utterance of unbelief, as had was the case with Jibillah b. al-Ayham.
Ibn al-Qayyim writes: “Anger is a disease. It is an illness. It is a sickness of the heart, no less that fever, melancholy, and epilepsy are sicknesses of the body. A person in the throes of anger is like a person in the throes of pneumonia, a fever or an epileptic fit.”
Ibn Hibbân writes [Rawdah al-`Uqalâ (140)]: “If there was nothing blameworthy in anger aside from the fact that all thinkers throughout the ages have agreed that an angry person is devoid of judgment, then that would be enough for him to do everything in his power to avoid getting angry.”
An angry person is incapable of thinking clearly and formulating a sound opinion. This is why the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “No one should judge between two people when he is angry.” [sahîh al-Bukhârî (6739) and Sahîh Muslim (1717)]
Based on this hadîth, many Islamic scholars have ruled that if a judge is angry when he gives a verdict, then that verdict is invalid. Ibn al-Qayyim says: “This is because anger confuses the person’s heart and mind and makes him incapable of complete understanding.”
7. Accepting Sincere Advice
When we see someone who is angry, we should advise him and remind him about the virtue of clemency and of controlling our rage. The person being advised needs to heed that advice.
Ibn `Abbâs relates that once, during `Umar’s reign as Caliph, al-Hurr b. Qays sought `Umar’s permission to admit `Uyaynah into his presence. `Umar gave him permission and `Uyaynah approached, saying: “O Sin of al-Khattâb. You do not give us all that much and you do not judge between us fairly.”
At this, `Umar became extremely angry and showed an intention to strike him, so al-Hurr b. Qays said: “O Commander of the Faithful! Allah said to His Prophet (peace be upon him): ‘Take recourse to pardon, enjoin what is good, and turn away from those who are ignorant.’ – Indeed, he is one of those who are ignorant.”
`Umar then did no more to the man than to recite the same verse to him. In this way,, he held himself in check with the words of Allah. [sahîh al-Bukhârî (4366)]
Ibn al-Qayyim writes [ighâthah al-Lahfân (47)]:
The enraged person is like some one in pain. This is why he say the things that he says and do the things that he does. He is trying to relieve himself of the heat of his anger. This is also why he might strike his own face, scream and shout, tear his clothes, or throw down whatever is in his hands. It is all to rid his flesh of the pain provoked by his anger. For the same reason, he might invoke Allah’s wrath upon himself or upon his loved ones, imploring with his words though not really wanting what he is asking for. He might invoke pronouncements that he does not really want to have carried out.
Kings sometimes issue commands that their courtiers know are not intended. It is just their king venting his anger. This is why they do not hasten to carry out those orders, and when the king’s anger subsides, he praises them for their discretion.
In the same way a man in the throes of anger might get up to beat his child or his friend. If someone else gets in the way and prevents him form doing so, the man will be grateful for that after his anger subsides, just like the man who is drunk or beset by fever is later grateful to the one who prevents his injudicious actions.
8. Learning from Past Experience
If we would only remember the last time we did something in anger that we sorely regretted, it would help us to restrain our baser selves in the future. It is far easier to stop ourselves from acting out of anger than it is to fix the mess we make when we let loose our rage.
Ibn Hibbân writes [Rawdah al-`Uqalâ (158)]: “Shortness of temper is a characteristic of imbeciles just as self-restraint is a sign of intelligence. Anger is the seed of regret. A person’s ability to restrain himself before letting loose his anger is greater than his ability to set things right again in its wake.”
http://www.islamtoday.com/showme2.cfm?cat_...&sub_cat_id=830
remedies foranger - Muslimah - 07-24-2006
Bismillah
as salam alykom dear Jameela
Jazaki Allah khairan katheeran, we did miss your reminders and posts. :)