The Meaning of Man


By Sidi Ali al-Jamal


Translated by Aisha Bewley


*****


Introduction to "The Meaning of Man" by Shaykh Abd al-Qadir as-Sufi


Until this edition only one copy of the book was in existence. For two hundred years the author's copy was kept at the place where he taught and during that time, regularly, every Thursday night, a small group of the intellectual elite of the city of Fez in Morocco would make their way down to the dyer's quarter to the small zawiyya of the great teacher, gather in a circle and read, examine and apply the method delineated in the hand-written manuscript before them. As of today, that circle still gathers. It is hoped that by publication of this extraordinary work, incomparable in its profundity and clarity, the circle of Fez scholars will be extended and that knowledge may be disseminated through it in this age of intellectual bankruptcy.


It is regrettable that in the present climate of academic 'learning' if one released the text of this masterwork without comment it would simply disappear without a trace, partly because of the vast amount of published literature of utter worthlessness and we refer here to the works published within the academic nexus, not the mountain of popular opiate writings put out in the modern state and partly because that very system of 'learning' is in its structure and method geared to anaesthetise any incoming organism that might threaten its supremacy. All literature published today is obliged, whether the authors know it or not, to be absorbed into a total culture module whose tentacles stretch round the whole world. The Peking Academy, the Russian university system and the Western academic community basically share the same world-view and accept the same central thesis that exalts the continuing tyranny of speculation, (defined as a 'freedom') the myth of research, the cult of system, and the priesthood of the doctorate.


Most important in our approach to this text is an understanding that access to its meanings and therefore its applications are impossible unless the reader is able to understand that he has to circumvent the quite imperialist block that stands in the way of approaching the book's subject matter. This may seem confusing until the reader considers that it is precisely the mystical claim of a methodology that proposes objectivity' as a basis of analysis that stands in the way of permitting this seminal text of a deep knowledge process to transform the reader. The author again and again in the book makes clear that the foundations of knowledge are only accessible to the one who is prepared to undergo a profound existential transformation. The idea of knowledge being an ideational process is not even considered. Men's words are not to be mistaken for men's deeds.


In the present social stasis which precedes the imminent total collapse of modern culture what we have called the imperialist doctrines of scholastic method use quite crude techniques to prevent any breaking out of the so-called scientific ethos. If this book is categorised as religion it would automatically forego its chance to land on the desk of the man who is intellectually seeking to acquire knowledge within the present rigid system. Worse if it is labelled mysticism it would also come under automatic fire as being either irrelevant or decadent. This book is not a religious work, nor is it a mystical work, for the author's evaluation of these, and indeed, of this his own book makes it quite clear that the approach to knowledge involves an operational zone taking in the whole life-pattern of the student. The partitive and divisive thinking of the academics is geared to keep their own quite mystical search for the pure knowledge that they claim they will arrive at in the future as elusive as the moral and just society that they promise the helpless slaves of the industrial prison. Production is the god of these barbarians, and nowhere is it allowed to suggest that the chains of the worker are forged in the factory, that the chains of the society are the linked units of the production process, which the whole so called intellectual community labours to defend.


Let us say it another way. If the creational and knowledge principle outlined so clearly and scientifically in this masterwork were applied it would overthrow the whole monstrous statist system of tyranny that modern man has encased himself in, for in it the freedoms he has been so cunningly taught to desire are chimeric and worthless. Real freedom, as a project, is politically forbidden.


We are saying openly that these men of the Darqawi way of learning are men of freedom. They have mastered themselves, so everyone is free around them. The present society has leaders who are inwardly in chaos so everywhere around them is oppression. The great fear of modern society is not that of the police - it is merely an outward manifestation of the inner fear of the power group who lead society. The leaders of modern society are walking demonstrations of terror - their own fears, that so fix them in bodily and mental rigidity, crush the other, not only physically but in a restrictive mental atmosphere that has no outcome but violence and death.


The dream-like, trance-like move towards complete stasis in this society, with its compulsive polarisations of desire for security and vulnerability to attack, both on the domestic and the military level, this sickness and its cure are clearly outlined in this book. The means to the dismantling of the suicide pact in which this age seems trapped can be found in these pages. Here is a method, the application of which brings liberation - not, as is clear from the book's central theme, an a-political freedom but a total transformative restoration of man as a human animal who is benign to his own inwardness and to the outwardness of his brothers. He is no danger to society and society cannot endanger him. It is significant that despite the persecution the men of knowledge have been submitted to, the teaching survives, and the teachers survive - they fight, they take to the mountains, they hide in the cities. This is not a poetic statement, it is a historical one.


The author, the Master, Sidi 'Ali al-Jamal, who taught in his small centre in Fez, although he had many people studying under him, in the end passed on the whole of his teaching to only one man. That man was Moulay al-Arabi ad-Darqawi. From him were to come forty great teachers who spread across North Africa and penetrated as far as Malaysia and the islands off East Africa. Now the descendants of that knowledge lineage are to be found in England and America.


The Darqawi men were slaughtered and tortured by the colonial french occupation forces under the fanatical catholic leadership of the governor of Morocco, General Leauty. When the French departed, the modernist and statist elite who took over in the name of national freedom continued the persecution.


These men were a threat because you could not build a consumer-state if there existed men who pointed out that if you were a consumer you would only be consumed. You could not forge a modern production-religion if there were men roaming about free to tell people not only that the happy and just society would not be built after all the misery, murder, and destruction as promised, but in fact that the free society already did exist, had never not existed.


The men of knowledge who have basically followed this way have been all but eliminated in the Communist world, both Russia and China, their works as well as their lives having been wiped out. On the Indian sub-continent these men are almost gone, thanks to the superbly sophisticated ruthlessness of the British and by their slaves, the 'modernists' who followed in their wake and now are the power elite in India and Pakistan. Persia went under at the same time that the Arab states were broken up, the Khalifate of Istanbul was smashed, and the squalid Western-authored rule of Ataturk saw these men hanged in every town and village across Turkey. North Africa and West Africa experienced the same brilliant strategy of military initiative backed by Jesuit research and business interest. In the end the whole Darqawi way and its equivalent lines of knowledge had been annihilated by assassination, denunciation, and a most far-reaching propaganda to devalue the practices and even the epistemology of the different lines of learning.


The learning grid presented in this work seems very far from the violent and barbaric attack that the men of learning had to withstand. It is a cool and ravishingly beautiful method of understanding the self/universe and the therefore the Universal. It is a clear statement of how existence works. Nothing less and nothing more. Once the central grid has been understood, and once the learner has set himself the de-programming course without which none of the book's contents can make sense, then that grid can be applied to any science, for what is valid for the science of knowledge is therefore a paradigm for any knowledge system or science. It is applicable both to molecular biology and economic theory. Already from its nature it is clear that the gross and exclusive divisions of scientism are not possible in real knowledge. For example, it will emerge that there is no such thing as psychology-in-itself nor is there such a thing as astronomy-in-itself. If you wish to understand these areas you must set out the limits of a new science in a dual mirror-construct that is only possible to describe in the current manner of this society as psychology/astronomy. Only we would see and define no difference. The uses to which this METHOD'MANUAL may be put probably will not emerge for some time. It will first have to reach those intellects that have not been totally drugged by the ghastly superficialities that pass for learned dissertation in our society. There is intellectually nothing more depressing than to read or try to read the trivial texts of the linguistic science and the existentially barren texts of the social theorists.


Ibn al-'Arabi has said that if you make a model of the universe you can only make a model of yourself. Though a social theory is veiled in complexity and priestly hermeneutics, yet it can never bring a new society, however alluring, if the theorist himself is a tyrant. I do not mean just a political tyrant, I mean a human tyrant.


Let us try some clear statements arising out of this book. According to the present barbarian culture social reality begins with the group. The private project is denied any reality. If you have a private project, the highest project of course would be knowledge, then you are anti-social and anti-productive. Your quest does not serve the people (i.e. production). Therefore you are not 'the people.' In linguistic terms let us say it again. If the statement has meaning it will be because the sentence structure is meaningful and successfully delineates, by its verbal method and not just by its noun indicators, what is intended in practice. This meaning structure is primary and everything is secunded to it. So vital is the 'content' that the words are its slaves but more important the letters from which the words and the structures are built are considered devoid of meaning. The phonemes are meaningless but the sentence has meaning.


Meaning only emerges with the complexity of the structure- but before the sentence is said does it not already have to be 'lined up' in consciousness? Let us look at it in the biological realm. The creature is simple in structure and capacities within a given environment - semiotically it is a term serving a movable function within a sentence-environment. If the sentence is complexified the term must change by the addition of a prefix or suffix, for example. But its meaning is dependent on that sentence arrangement. It will 'change' as the sentence changes. But the phoneme in this picture cannot understand the sentence - which has not yet been said - or indeed while it is being said. How then can the DNA molecules order a new printout and a new NRA response that will trigger a new protein arrangement? Obversely, the organism does not command the molecules nor the sentence line up the phonemes. If meaning is not already in the phoneme the sequence is incomprehensible. This is true of the sentence, the man, and the organism. It is meaning we are dealing with at every level. The meaning is prior to the phoneme, is in the phoneme, is in the process, is in the new sentence.


We live in an age where the meaning of man itself is in danger, therefore man is in danger, therefore his environment, this Earth is in danger. We live in a society that is determined to destroy man and make him the servant of the lowest aspects of himself, instead of the master of the highest aspects of himself. In the recognition that this nadir point of human worth is taking us to the time when man will be restored in his splendour as a locus of knowledge we have published this magisterial work. Of its nature it cannot be studied in a university or classroom. It can only be applied in the circle of men who follow this method of the transformation of the self that is the ancient knowledge way that the anthropologists had been employed to cover over.


In this time, if men want to know, they must set out in search of men who live to know, and who have freed themselves from the crushing a-culturisation process that makes the products of our universities such zombie-like historical products. Such men are not part of the problem nor are they part of the solution.


For it is the current dialectic that is the tyranny of modern society. It is the method itself of this culture that is its madness. Here is another way, and in it man is not endangered - he is liberated and that means life for all those around him. Just as knowledge is not to be found in either social upheaval or in stasis, just as it is not to be found either in esotericism and experimental groups or in power structures, so the seeker must break out of his cultural mould and recognise that knowledge is the property of the poor. If poverty were eliminated, knowledge would be eliminated. It is the only clue we can leave in writing. The way of poverty is the way of knowledge. We write it on the cave wall. We write it on your heart.


From the poor slave


the helpless, the needy,


'Abd al-Qadir as-Sufi.

<b>THE FOUNDATIONS OF ISLAM</b>


By QADI ‘IYAD


Translated by Aisha Bewley


SHAHADA


This must include belief with the heart and pronouncing with the tongue.


In detail there are 40 BELIEFS –


<b>10 – THE NECESSITY OF WHICH IS ACCEPTED</b>



10 – THE IMPOSSIBILITY OF WHICH IS ACCEPTED


10 – THE EXISTENCE OF WHICH IS ESTABLISHED


10 – THE COMING OF WHICH IS CERTAIN


THE TEN NECESSARY THINGS (WAJIBA) THAT YOU ACCEPT ARE:


1. That Allah is One, undivided in His essence.


2. That there is no second with Him in His divinity.


3. That He is Living, Self-Subsistent.


4. That He is neither diminished (by time) nor does sleep overtake Him.


5. That He is the God of everything and its Creator.


6. That He has power over everything.


7. That He knows what is outwardly apparent and what is inwardly hidden: ‘Not an atom’s weight escapes Him, neither in the heavens nor in the earth.’


8. That He wills every created thing – bad or good – ‘What He willed came into being and what He did not will, did not.’


9. That He hears, sees and speaks without any bodily parts and without instrument – rather, His hearing, seeing and speech are some of His attributes, and His attributes do not resemble ordinary attributes.


10. Similarly, His essence does not resemble ordinary essences. ‘There is nothing like Him – and He is the Hearer and the Seer.’


THE TEN IMPOSSIBLE THINGS (MUSTAHILA) THAT YOU ACCEPT ARE:


1. That coming into being in time is impossible for Him, may He be exalted.


2. That non-existence is impossible for Him – rather, He is by His attributes and names Pre-Existent, Going-On, Eternally Existent, standing in judgment over every self for what it has earned. He has no first and no last – rather, ‘He is the First and the Last.’


3. That it is impossible that there is a god other than Him: ‘If there had been any gods except Allah in heaven or earth, they would both be ruined.’


4. That it is impossible that He is not independent of all His creation, and impossible that He needs any supporter in His kingship.


5. That it is impossible that one affair takes His attention from another in His decreeing and His giving orders.


6. That it is impossible that any place in His heavens or His earth contains Him – rather He is as He was before the creation of place.


7. That it is impossible that He is either substance or body or that He has a shape or a form, or that anything resembles Him and that He has a likeness – rather He is the One, the Eternally Self-Subsistent who has not given birth, nor was He born, nor does He have any equal.


8. That it is impossible that events and changes change Him or that defects and damage reach Him.


9. That it is impossible that injustice attaches to Him – rather the whole of His decree is wisdom and justice.


10. That it is impossible that any of the acts of His creation is without His decree and His act of creation and His will – rather, ‘The words of Your Lord are complete in their truthfulness and justice – no-one can change His words’ – ‘He leads astray whom He wishes and He guides whom He wishes’ – ‘He is not asked about what He does but they will be asked.’


THE TEN THINGS, THE EXISTENCE OF WHICH IS ESTABLISHED, THAT YOU ACCEPT ARE:


1. That Allah, may He be exalted, sent His Prophets and His Messengers to His slaves.


2. That He sent down on them His signs and His books.


3. That he sealed messengerhood with our Prophet Muhammad, may Allah bless him and grant him peace.


4. That He ‘sent down on him the Qur’an as a guidance for mankind with clear proofs in its guidance and discrimination.’


5. That it is the speech of our Lord, neither created nor creating.


6. That the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, was truthful in what he told.


7. That his law (Shari’ah) abrogates all the other laws.


8. That the Garden and the Fire are real.


9. That they are both in existence, prepared for the people of misery and happiness.


10. That the angels are real – some of them recording, writing the deeds of the slaves, and some of them messengers of Allah to His Prophets and some of them ‘severe harsh angels who do not disobey Allah in what He orders them to do and who do as they are commanded.’


THE TEN THINGS WHICH IT IS BELIEVED ARE CERTAIN TO COME ARE:


1. That this world will come to an end and ‘everything that is on it will come to an end.’


2. That people will be tried in their graves and they will be given ease and given torment therein.


3. That Allah will gather them together on the Day of Rising – as He made them originally, they will return.


4. That the Reckoning and the Balance are real.


5. That the Path (Sirat) over the Fire to the Garden is real.


6. That the Pond (Hawd) is real.


7. That the people of right action will be in bliss in the Garden.


8. That the kafirun will be in the Fire in intense heat.


9. That the muminun will see Allah, the Mighty, the Majestic, with their eyesight in the Next World.


10. That Allah the Exalted will punish with the Fire whoever He wants of the people of serious wrong action (kabira) among the believers and will forgive whichever of them He wishes, and He will take them out of the Fire to the Garden by the overflowing generosity of His mercy and the intercession of the Prophets and the right-acting people among His slaves, until none but the kafirun will remain in Jahannam – ‘Allah does not forgive that any partner be associated with Him, but He forgives whoever He wishes for what is less than that.’

The only survior of a shipwrecker was washed upon a small,uninhabited island.He prayed fevirishly to rescue him, and everyday he scanned the horizon for help,but none seemed forthcoming.


Exausted,he eventually managed to build a little hut out of driftwood to protect him self from the elements, and to store his few possesions.But one day after scavaging for food,he arrived home to find hislittle hut in flames,thesmoke rolling up to the sky.The worst had happened. everything was lost.He was stunned with grief and anger.he


cried to the lord,"How can u do this to me"?Early the next day ,however he was wakened by the sound of a ship that was approaching him.It had come to rescue him.How did u know that i was here?asked the wearyman of his rescuers,:We saw ur smoke signals.'they replied.


It iseasy to get discouraged some times when thing appear to be going badly..But we shouldn,t lose heart because Allah the Almighty is at work in our lives, even in the midst of pain and suffering.Remember next time ur little hut is burning to the ground,it just may be a smoke signal that summons the grace of Allah.For all the negative things we have to say to ourselvesAllah the Great has a positive answer for it.

Assalamu alaikum wa-ramadan kareem!


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Ma`salam

Not everything that comes through TV is bad. However, because the average child between two and 11 years old watches over 27 hours of poorly supervised television per week; because the only thing that kids do more than watch television is sleep, and because most parents are unaware of the indecent liberties that television takes with our children, you must control this 19 inch Shaitan, as a friend of mine calls it.


1) Halal (permissible) and Haram (forbidden) on TV: TV programs include stirring documentaries about history, science, and nature as well as excellent dramatizations of classics. It also includes a lot of Haram in terms of violence, sex, antifamily and anti-Islamic values in cartoons, sitcoms, talk shows and films. It's the job of parents to observe Halal and Haram on TV programs and guide their children. One rule you can use when teaching your kids the right and wrong of television is the following: if it's Haram to do then, it's Haram to watch.


2) TV Rules for Children: A carefully programmed TV can be a beneficial ally! Set clear rules for your children on how much TV they can watch, when they can watch it, and which shows are permitted. Then stick to your policy no matter how many tears and voices protest. You are the boss. You can unplug the television whenever you want to.


3) Don't Just Allow "Watching TV": Allow children to watch a particular program which you have approved, not just "watch TV."


4) No Channel Surfing: Channel surfing usually means watching the worst of the shows which are on at any given moment. More stops at sex and violence scenes.


5) Homework First: Insist that homework and chores be done before TV is turned on. (No this is not considered child abuse, not at least in Illinois where I live.) Only one in ten parents require children to do homework first at this moment.


6) Watch Together: Watch TV with your children. It will be lots of fun. You might have some topics to talk about later. You may share some laughter as well. If you cannot watch with them all the time, at least do it occasionally.


7) Talk to Children about the Programs: Talking to your children about the programs they watched or you watched together will give you an opportunity to debrief them about the rights and wrongs in them.


8) Never Use TV as Babysitter: No matter what, don't just train your little Muslim to become an avid TV watcher by letting TV calm him down when he is crying or when you want to do something else other than attend to the baby. Also make this rule clear to the babysitters you hire as well. If you have no choice but to subject you child to a daycare center, choose one which does not use TV as its control mechanism. Seventy percent of daycare centers use TV during a typical day.


9) A Smaller Screen is Better: A small-sized TV is better than a larger size TV. The larger size encourages worse watching habits.


10) One TV is Better than Two: One TV placed in the living room will help you keep an eye on what is being watched. A TV in your child's bedroom is the worst thing. It is not that you don't trust your children. It is the TV which you don't trust. The average household in America has 2.24 TVs in their homes and 54 percent of kids in America have a TV in their bedrooms.


11) No Cable Channels: With a few exceptions, cable provides more of the bad TV and adult-oriented programming. I was staying at a pious Muslim's home as the TV brought a rush of his kids in the room I was staying in. To my astonishment, they ignored their "uncle's" presence and protest as they intensely watched a hot nude sex scene on some cable channel. Recently in Florida, during the daytime, a cable company showed adult programs.


12) Encourage Commercial-Free Channels: Public Television and other Commercial Free TV have more informative programs. It is estimated that the average child sees 20,000 commercials per year. Unlike adults, who often mute out commercials, or who get up and make a mad dash for the bathroom during the 60 to 180 seconds, children like TV ads. They like to be told what to lobby for...and lobby they do.


13) VCR Gives Parents More Control: VCR gives you control of TV time and programs. Many parents use the VCR more than television programs broadcast scheduled times. Balance your TV consumption with videos of good programming offered by Muslims and non-Muslims. This will be more in your control and will contribute to the learning process of children. Some of the good video programs could be as good as anything on TV. Adam's World for children ages two to nine is one such video series. Tens of thousands of children learn and have fun with Adam and Aneesah.


One day, I noticed Sister Lonnie Ali (Champion Muhammad Ali's wife) had ordered another set of Adam's World. Since I knew they had a complete set of Adam's World, I asked why she was buying another one. She told me that Asad (their son) had watched Adam's World so many times that all the tapes were worn out. She said he must have watched each tape more than 100 times. His game at one point was to say the dialogue before Adam said it.


14) TV Off Days: Some Muslims keep TV off all Ramadan. Every year there is a campaign called TV Turn Off Week, which encourages people to not watch TV for at least a week. You may want to do the same for very personal reasons. Television can affect young children in adverse ways: aggressive behavior, difficulty falling asleep, nightmares and an insatiable appetite for advertised products. If your kids are showing signs of this nature, eliminating TV for a week or so may help.


15) More Family Activities: TV takes away family time. Poorly managed television wastes opportunities for kids to learn how to relate to other people - including their parents and siblings. And relating with their families is a desire of today's youth. In a nationwide, ethnically balanced survey of 750 ten to sixteen-year-olds, "three-quarters said that if they had a choice between watching TV or spending time with their families, they'd opt for family time."


16) Buy a Movie Camera: Yes you read it correctly. Instead of children being subject to TV, give them the tools to control TV. Empower them with technology. Give them a gift of a video camera. Consumer Reports has a lot of recommendations for good camcorders. Let your kids write a script, shoot a video, edit it on their computer, and put it back on VCR or incorporate it in a multimedia production (and send a copy to Sound Vision. That little producer might have more talent than you think.)


17) Plan Your Time: If you develop the habit of developing a personal plan, children are likely to follow you in the considerate use of their time. By developing a plan for using your time, you will learn to place TV time in proper proportion to other things in life which you want to achieve.


18) Start a TV Journal: To make good use of TV programs, ask children to write a report about it. Have them answer questions like: who were the characters? What was the plot? What was good? What was bad? What did the program try to promote? Let them be the critic instead of simply being lost to agenda of television producers.


19) Fight bad TV programs: Always protest wrong types of things inserted by producers in what you and your children watch. If you don't protest and pursue the matter, they will learn that they can get away with this and will do more of it, not less. Call toll-free to record your dislike of a program: 1-800-TV-COUNTS (operated by the Parents' Television Council, a family oriented, non-Muslim group).


20) Stick to Your Guns: Your children will resist all rule-making efforts to limit their TV time and program selection. Discuss your reasoning with them, but stick to your guns. This is a decision about their growing up as Muslims. More than 4,000 studies have proven that the behavior of children is affected by their TV watching habits. You cannot let false images and wrong ideals distort the future of your children. You must help tomorrow's Muslims today by being reasonable, but firm. If you don't control TV, TV will control you, your pocket, your children, and your worldview.


21) Children Follow You: The bottom line principle of parenting is that children follow you. If you are a couch potato, and fail to practice what you preach, don't expect your rules to have any value. Watch what you are watching if you want anyone to follow your rules about TV. Whether you give prime time to your family or to TV will determine the future direction of your life and your children's life.


"O ye who believe! Why do you preach something you are not practicing? It is of most distasteful in the sight of Allah that ye say that which ye do not" (Quran: 61:2-3).


By: Abdul Malik Mujahid


Source: soundvision.com

It never ceases to amaze me how many people complain about their children’s bad tempers and have not the faintest idea what to do when their children get angry.


We are often surprised and hurt by the things we hear our children say in anger, their hands folded across their chests, words like: “I hate you!” and “I don’t want you!” and “I don’t love you anymore!” Children say such things when they are angry, and parents are often at a loss to respond with anything other than harsh words, curses, and a good smack. Most parents have no better remedy to administer and justify themselves by saying that they are disciplining their children for their bad manners.


In truth, cursing and hitting the child is nothing more than a hasty reaction from the parents dressed up in the guise of “discipline”.


There are many things that the parents need to take into consideration in order to handle the situation correctly and remedy their children’s tempers:


* When we consider the guidance of the Prophet (p.b.u.h.), we observe that he never once struck his wife or servant. I am not merely discussing the question of “to hit or not to hit”. What I am saying is that hitting often exacerbates the problem far more than it remedies it.


* Many parents are confused about what they should do first when their child gets angry – should they focus on the cause of the anger or on the anger itself?


In my personal estimation, it seems that seeking a solution for the cause of the anger is better than trying to remedy the anger itself. Eliminating the cause of a problem is invariably a solution to the problem.


* If we as adults fail to exhibit any self-restraint when we are angry, how can we expect our children to do so? It is important for us to raise our children to know how to stay calm and collected and deal with things in a rational manner. If we are neglectful in this, then we will have no recourse but to calm the child down when he gets angry and then try to find out how to deal with the cause of his anger.


There is an old Arab saying that goes: “You cannot give what you do not have.” This is true. If the parent has a bad temper and is unable to control himself when he gets angry, how can he fault his child for the same? The parent is the role model. The child does what he sees his parents doing.


* Why should we not discuss the matter with our children when they get angry? Isn’t it better to use such a tone than it is to cry and shout, which only causes the child even more distress? There is no problem with using a conversational tone in discussing matters with our children. In the Quran, we see that the Lord of All the Worlds uses such a tone with his angels and His Prophets. We see the Prophet Solomon (p.b.u.h.) using such a tone even when he speaks to a bird. Is not it more appropriate for us to do so with our children who are our own flesh and blood?


Many parents address their children in a demeaning, condescending tone, simply because their children are small and their young minds have not matured. The parents see that the time to show respect has not yet arrived. I see this as a big mistake, though one that is very common. If we look to the Prophet (p.b.u.h.) for guidance, we see that he behaved very respectfully towards children.


* We need to exercise a lot of patience when dealing with children. A child is naturally eager and impressionable, with an unlimited imagination. It is wrong to expect him to behave like an adult when he has yet to learn to distinguish between what is beneficial and what is harmful. This explains to us the reason why the Prophet (p.b.u.h.) descended from the pulpit to meet his grandchildren al-Hasan and al-Husayn, even though many prominent Companions were standing before him.


* It is a serious mistake for our children to feel unloved by his parents. This is the case even when the child is being punished. The feeling of love should be ever-present, even when administering bitter medicine. This is especially true since our children have hold of our hearts, and in spite of their tender years, they have an influence over us.


* We need to accustom our children to communicating their feelings to us, to express themselves properly when they are angry instead of crying and shouting.


When we come to know the cause of the anger, we need to speak to our children on their own level and explain matters to them in a way that they can understand. We cannot deal with them as if they were adults like ourselves, we must deal with them on their own level, no matter how trivial their problems may seem to us.


We can think about how a little girl took the Prophet’s hand and he allowed her to lead him around wherever she wanted to go.


A child needs to feel that he lives in an environment of controlled freedom. He should not live in an atmosphere of constant control and domination so that he represses his feelings and his identity.


* In one survey, it was determined that 70% of the children living in the Gulf region suffer from psychological disorders of one kind or another. We find ourselves between two opposite extremes – that of going overboard in controlling and disciplining our children and that of utter laxity. What is needed is a just balance.


I know some very respectable people who insist on pining over every detail when it comes to “raising” their children, so much so that the child can scarcely breathe without being taken to account for it. When the father comes to me with his son in tow, the boy’s face is ashen and he is visibly disturbed. This is because the child is not allowed to act in any way other than according to his father’s mindset, which is an impossible burden for the mind of a small child.


* We must teach our children to seek means to control their anger. We might instruct them to perform ablutions or to sit down if they are standing or to take hold of a book or some other object. If he does so and his anger subsides, then he should be commended and rewarded for keeping his anger under control. Do not withhold the praise when your child keeps himself calm. Let him know with your words and gestures that you recognize his achievement. Give him a little token of appreciation, even just the pen in your shirt pocket.


* Allow the child to role-play. Be the angry one and let your child try to calm you down. Let his try whatever means he feels are appropriate.


* It is better for a child to say “I feel angry because of this or that” than it is for him to scream and shout.


* The dictatorial approach is not always the right one. We need to avoid saying things like “Shut up!” “Get out of my sight!” “If I get my hands on you, I am going to break your head!” and “Don’t use that impudent tone with me!”


At times, might we rather say: “Dear, I am your father (or mother, as the case may be) and I love you. I feel it when you are angry, so do not distress me so.” What is important is for the child to empathize with your feelings. The child today will be an adult tomorrow, and if we do not develop such an empathy with our children when they are young, we may regret it down the road.


* We should take to heart the example of the Prophet (p.b.u.h.). Anas said about him: “I swear by Allah. I have never seen anyone show more mercy to his family that Allah’s Messenger (p.b.u.h.).” (Sahih Muslim 2316)


The Prophet (p.b.u.h.) loved children. He wept when his little son Ibrahim died.


Whenever a child was born, they would bring the child to the Prophet (p.b.u.h.) and he would offer supplications for the child. Sometimes he would change a child’s name to a better one. He used to play with children and humor them.


When al-Hasan, the Prophet’s grandson came running into the Prophet’s room and jumped down in front of him, the Prophet (p.b.u.h.) embraced him and kissed him and said: “O Allah! Love him and love those who love him.” (Sahih al-Bukhari 2122 and Sahih Muslim 2421)


He would go to the mosque, carrying either al-Hasan or al-Husayn on his shoulder. Once he prayed his prayers while carrying Umamah bint Zainab in his arms. He consoled a small child whose pet bird had died. He would even seek the permission of a child sitting to his right to allow him to offer a drink first to some elders on his left. When the child refused to waive his right, the Prophet (p.b.u.h.) served the child first. We see where `Amr b. Salamah was appointed to lead the prayers for his people though he was only six years old, simply because he was the most knowledgeable among them of the Quran.


Examples like these abound, and when we regard them, the greatness of the Prophet’s character becomes all the more evident to us. We realize that the best schools of education and childrearing in the East and West are in need of the light of our Prophet’s example.


By: Shaikh Salman al-Awdah


Source: www.islamtoday.net

Bismillah


as salam alykom


http://www.altafsir.com/indexArabic.asp


excellent comprehensive site about Quran

Rasoolullah(S.A.W)said,when a women breastfeeds, then on every gulp of milk ,she receives the reward as though she has granted life to a being and when she weans her child the angels pat on her back saying, congradulations;all your past sins have been forgiven,now start all over again.


The child has a right to fed on mother,s milk.It is this bounty of mother for which Quran emphasises on the child to treat the mother with exceptinal loveand kindness, in return for this service.


Mother,s milk is a natural food. It needs no prepareration.Almighty Allah has provided it for the saftey of the child,s health and growth.


Beside being nourishing ,the bonds of affection between mother and child are strengthened.Mother,s milhkis also a spiritual and ethical nourishment for the child.It deeply affect the whole personality of the child.The mother not only provides best nourishment to the child, but also infuses with every drop of her milk,her own ways of thinking and attitudes in to the child,s vein.It is also the duty of the mother to inculate in to the child with each drop of milk, the concept of oneness of Allah,love for Rasoolullsh(S.A.W.)and devotion for Islam


Rasoolullah S.A.W) advised mothers to suckle their children,and said they will be rewarded for doing this in Dunya and Ahira bythe Almighty Allah.He told them


"and for the first sip of her milk she gives to her child,the mother gets a reward equivalent to giving life to a person.


moreover he equalled a suckling mother to a dutiful warrier who guards the frontiers and she will achieve the status of a martyr if she dies during this period.


Denying the child the right to be suckled without any valid reason is unfair and unjust and below the dignity of the mother.Mothers who doesnot suckle their babies due to fear of deformed and loss of their beauty and shape, are no doubt r the most ruthless ones who donot deserved to be called mothers.There is no alternative for mothers milk.


RasoolullahS.A.W.) has warned such heartless women against terrible puinisment to be meted out to them by Allah.Describing the events of the night of Ascension, he said


'Then they took me further ahead and I saw some women whose breast were being continiously bitten by snakes.On asking about the indentify of these women ,i was told that those were the women who didnot breastfeed their babies.


Meical opinion on mother,s milk


--------------------------------------------


After childbirth the mother.s milk contains colostrum for some days.This important substance helps immensly in baby,s growth as it contains vitamin A.But after aperiod the colostrum looses this valuable vitamin A. avoidence of suckling the child right from the begining will deprive him of this vitamin which will result in deficient in growth.Besides, colostrum also helps babies resist external infection to which they are exposed and susceptible,The new born babies are usually exposed to the infection of the lungs and throat.They often devolop pnewmonia or diptheria etc in their early stage of life which might prove fatal for them.But if they receive adequate quantities of colostrum,they devolop resistance to such deadly infection


The infants who die during the first month of their birth are usually found to be deficient in this substance.


scientist have tried to reproduce mothers,s milk in the laboratory but failed to get the axact formula.


Before breast feeding, one should read Bismillah.........The baby;s first feed should be from the right breast.

Bismillah


Assalamu alaikum


Anyone that can help me sorte out what this really means? I thought it was the same as Laylatul Qadr, now I am not sure.


wasalam

Excerpted from Manaar As-sabeel


In each of the daily prayer we offer, we solemnly declare to Allah, “Iyyaka na’budu” (You alone do we worship). While the intelligent and committed believer realizes that his very lifestyle spells worship, he knows, remembering the words of our Prophet (pbuh) that “Du’aa’ (supplication) is worship” [Tirmidhi, Abu Daud] Allah, the Most Merciful, has encouraged the believers to take advantage of certain times during the year to make du’aa’. Such an occasion presents itself annually during Ramadan — especially on the Lailatul Qadr, the Night of Power. On this night, the single most important event in human history unfolded as, after the Glorious Quran was preserved in the Protected Tablet, Jibril descended with the blessed book to reveal it, upon Allah’s command, to His Messenger (pbuh). Accentuating its significance, Allah says “and how would you know (the value of the) Night of Qadr [97:2] So valuable is this Night of Qadr that the Quran devotes a special surah to it. “Lailatul Qadr is better than a thousand months” [97:3] This one night surpasses the value of 30,000 nights. The most authentic account of the occurrence of the Night indicates that it can occur on any one of the last ten, oddnumbered nights of Ramadan. The fact that the exact night is unknown reflects Allah’s will in keeping it hidden. Indeed, the Prophet (pbuh) was prevented from telling us its precise time. One day, he came out to tell the companions the exact night. On the way he saw two men arguing with each other. By the will of Allah, he(pbuh)forgot and subsequently remembered it. Afterwards the Prophet (pbuh) was instructed not to divulge this information. “Had I been allowed,” he (pbuh) remarked once, “I would have told you (of its exact time).” [Ahmad] The Almighty in His wisdom kept this hidden from us for many reasons. Perhaps He wants us to strive hard in our worship during the last ten days of Ramadan so that we don’t become lazy, worshipping hard on just that one night and denying ourselves the benefit of doing the same on the other nights. “Had people not left their salah except for that (one) night, I would have informed you (of its exact date).” [Al-Tabarani] The sincere believer who worries day and night about his sins and phases of neglect in his life patiently awaits the onset of Ramadan. During it he hopes to be forgiven by Allah for past sins, knowing that the Prophet (pbuh) promised that all who bear down during the last ten days shall have all their sins forgiven. To achieve this, he remembers the Prophet’s (pbuh) advice in different sayings wherein he used words like “seek”, “pursue”, “search”, and “look hard” for Lailatul Qadr. Moreover, Allah and His Prophet (pbuh) provided us some signs of its occurrence. Allah (swt) describes the night as “..peace until the rise of the morn.” [97:5] In various sayings, the Prophet (pbuh) described the night as serene, tranquil, and peaceful. The sun at sunrise would appear reddish and without its normal blazing and sharp rays. The Prophet (pbuh) added that “the angel of earth on that night of Qadr will be more numerous than all the pebbles of the earth.”


What should one do during the last ten days in pursuit of Lailatul Qadr? The devoted servant of Allah makes these nights alive with prayer, reading and reflecting on Quran. He makes du’aa’ to Allah, penitently beseeching Him for His forgivness. He is inspired by the Prophet’s (pbuh) words “Our Lord, most Exalted, Most high comes down to the lowest heaven during the last third of each night and announces (reassuringly): Whoever makes du’aa’, I shall answer it. Whoever asks (for something halal) I shall grant it; and whoever seeks forgiveness, I shall forgive him.” [bukhari] The believer, conscious of Allah and their sins, will continue to beseech Allah, in and out of prayer, during his prostration. For a time, the only concern will be cleansing oneself of the forgetfulness that this life propagates in one’s heart, the sins that accumulate, darkening the heart, making it insensitive to disobeying Allah. He begs Allah to keep him away from misfortunes in this world, the punishment of the grave, and the torment of Hell. He asks Allah to make him patient and steadfast in struggling to maintain his Islam in this world and asks Him to overlook his shortcomings, periods of laziness and neglect. Sincere devotion on that night will render the believer forgtful of the time, until he is surprised by the Adhan of Fajr. After Fajr, as the sun creeps above the horizon, reddish and weak in its appearance, without any rays, the effort at night will have been worthwhile. The believer rejoices, knowing that this was quite possibly Lailatul Qadr and “whoever stays up (in prayer and remembrance of Allah) on the Night of Qadr fully believing (in Allah’s promise of reward for that night) and hoping to seek reward (from Allah alone and not from people), he shall be forgiven for his past sins.” [bukhari, Muslim]